This blog is the real, much too bias, hopefully funny, brutally honest account of my life.
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Monday, June 9, 2014

Spaces

Your spot was empty today.
I've started to dig out spaces for you to live. Your seat at the table. Your space on the couch. Your presence has changed me. It's shaken me up and rattled me down. I didn't realize this was what it would feel like. Making space for you is easy. Having time for you is my favorite. I feel your influence in the mundane things of every day. Picking up your favorites at the store. Washing one or two extra loads. Making a little more dinner so you have a lunch. 
I guess that's what makes the inevitable so tragic. When your gone, I have these spaces. Blocks of time left unused. Empty thoughts without a direction to fly. Without you there are holes.  
Like holes in my skin, they take time to heal. But longer. No bandaid can mend the space where you were. 
In the meantime I keep stretching. The holes get bigger and the scars left from previous holes get less noticeable. 
One day I'm sure I'll find the one. The one that will make spaces for me. The one that will have spaces so large, neither of us dare leave for the spaces can't be filled. Not by anyone else at least. I'm honest when I say I hope that it's you. I hope your spaces won't be filled by another. You're the best I've ever had. But then again, I said that last time didn't I? 

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