Things Postpartum Taught Me

I wrote this to help me remember, and to hopefully help another mama/soon to be mama adjust to their new normal.

It's OK to feel like you know nothing. 

Bringing home a baby is a BIG DEAL. I can’t even count the number of times Kyle and I have looked at each other puzzled, or pulled out our phones to google something, or uttered the words “I don’t know, this is my first time too!” At first this was so overwhelming and frankly, kind of frustrating. I’m not known for “winging it.” But honestly, that’s kind of how the past few weeks have gone for us...and it’s OKAY. We still don’t know how everything is going to go, but it feels a whole lot less overwhelming now. 

Baby snuggles are THE best

There is NOTHING and I mean NOTHING better than sitting with a sleeping (or awake but content) newborn baby. I honestly never thought I would want to be pregnant again, but this *might* be enough to convince me. 

The dishes can wait. 

I don’t even know how many times I read this on blogs and advice forums—but it’s SO TRUE. Kyle and I usually keep a pretty tidy home. I knew this was going to be hard to let go, but honestly, it’s not the end of the world. I’m currently sitting in a recliner with bubs napping on my lap, staring at a house that is in shambles. There are dirty swaddles waiting to be washed, dishes in the sink from yesterday, and a kitchen floor that is in desperate need of a good scrubbing. But you know what? 4 weeks ago, I pushed out a 9lb watermelon sized human out of my body, and it’s more than OK that I’m not feeling up to cleaning my house. It’s also OK that even when I do have spurts I’d energy/feel up to things, that I sit and hold my baby while he sleeps...or that I make a run to the grocery store for some alone time. Baby is not going to be this small ever again, and I’m trying to soak up every glorious moment I can—and the solo trips are good for my sanity. Our house will be clean again one day. 

Sleep deprivation is not the end of the world. 

Of all the things I was most worried about postpartum, dealing with the sleep deprivation was the top of my list. It might sound silly, but I’ve never functioned well on less than 8 hours and I was legitimately scared of being a grouchy grump all the time. On average, I get about 4-5 hours of broken sleep at night. I am able to nap during the day—and usually try and steal an hour or two when Kyle is available to hold/help, but I haven’t slept more than 3 hours straight for two weeks now and it’s not been nearly as bad as I thought. Granted, I’m currently nursing a venti iced coffee, and I’m writing this post nap, but I’ve really done better than I expected functioning on such little amounts of sleep.

You can and will make the right choice for you and your baby. 

Having a baby opens up an entire new world of decisions and choices to be made...EVERY DAY. Should you wake the baby to feed so you hit the 12 recommended feedings a day or let them sleep for an extra 40 minutes? Should you offer a pacifier before 4 weeks or hold off until your supply is regulated? Should you pump to boost supply or only feed on demand? Is it okay to have that coffee even if the baby is going to feed before that 2 hour mark? Honestly, it’s overwhelming and google only makes it worse. It took a bit, but I’ve learned it’s best to trust your gut and make the decision that keeps you sane and your baby happy. 

Our bodies are incredible. 

I am honestly shocked at what my body has been through and how my perspective and attitude about myself has changed. First and foremost, I’m so grateful to not be pregnant. Even with all the postpartum healing, I feel so much more comfortable in my own skin. Of course I’m soft, and my belly skin hangs a little looser than before but I can stand up without grunting, and I can sleep on my belly, and my insides feel like they are so much more secure (you know not going to fall out with every step.) 

I was so nervous about how my body would change and if I would be able to love it again—you pretty much only read horror stories (or how someone had to work hard to love their body again.) This was not my story. My story was falling in love with my body felt like the most natural next step.

Honestly I’m kind of in awe of my body and the incredible changes it’s been through—not to mention how it works all day every day to feed my baby. I’ve never felt more comfortable or confident in my skin—and I have becoming a mama to thank for that.

All in all, being a mom is everything I’ve ever wanted and I’m so content with my life. Even with all of the scary things in the world right now, I feel at peace and at home in my new space. It’s been a big adjustment, but one happily made.